All I Did Was Open the Window a Crack

At three in the afternoon I looked at the clock and was a little startled. Going by the air in my room alone, I honestly couldn't tell if it was morning or evening.

Then I realized I hadn't opened the window in days. Not that I forgot — I just didn't have a reason to. I wasn't going anywhere, and nobody was coming over.

The room was exactly the same as yesterday. Same temperature, same smell, same light. At first I thought that was comfortable, but at some point it started to feel weirdly stuffy.

A cup from two days ago was still sitting on my desk. I don't think that was about me — when a room stands still, the things in it seem to stand still too.

Inside a closed-up room, the day turns into one big lump. The room won't tell you whether it's morning or afternoon, or whether now's a good time to start something.

Days like that feel strangely long and short at the same time. Even when evening came, it didn't feel like I'd actually had a day.

For a while I figured it was just my mood. I'm feeling low, so the room feels stuffy — that kind of thing.

But plenty of days, it went the other way around. Turns out people take after their spaces more than I thought. It's not a personality thing — it just happens.

So I tried opening the window. Not wide open, just a crack. And the air coming through that gap was a different temperature from the room.

Stand by the window for a moment and your body notices first. Oh — it's afternoon right now. Then I pulled back one side of the curtain, and with light coming in from one direction, the room perked up a little.

Last, I cleared away just one cup. Not the whole room — just the one. Even so, it felt like the room had started moving again.

All of it together takes a few minutes. It looks so small it seems like nothing, but it's small enough that I can actually do it today.

Three in the afternoon feeling like three in the afternoon — some days, that alone was pretty nice. Tomorrow when I get up, I think I'll start by opening the window a crack again.